Author Archives: siewfan


Flailing in the midst of tempest debris everywhere promises retracted recoiled when angels feared to tread the rock that forms when hurts congeal unyielding I who should have known better am the bitter fool instead

Tempest in the primordial mind debris everywhere chaos in the moment of destruction mind spits castles into the air structures fractured shelters collapse no refuge anywhere the “I” breaks down yields to calm mind becomes aware

Still in an espresso cup tempest swirling still steaming alchemy still waiting to yield the rich bitter deepness where are you now sweet angel in retreat outside where sweetness reside


Anemone Crab

I see you my dear, in your designer shoes, your MBA hung around your neck, like an anchor to the status quo. Drug induced sleep is still sleep. Normal people have normal anxiety, normal unhappiness, normal quiet desperation, don’t they?

I see you weary prince, wearing your hurt like a mantle within your castle walls you pace, misery magnified in each lonely echo, drowning soft laughter floating in through windows too high to see.

I see you anemone crab, beautifully armed with the toxins of another, trapped within your soft shell, helplessly scavenging the debris for morsels decaying and dead. Eyes looking up at the endless blue wondering what floats above the waves.

No, it’s not fatal.





That which is awareness is greater than consciousness

That which is conscious is greater than mind

That which is mind is greater than mental formations

That which is mental formation is based on reaction

That which is reaction is based on perception

That which is perception is based on perspective

That which is perspective is limited

That which is limited is illusion

That which is Illusion is transformed by wisdom

That which is wisdom arises from awareness


100 Days in the Light


Beloved why do you weep
I’ve found that which we seek
New worlds new sights and indeed
Boundless love wrapped with endless peace

Free the sorrow from your heart
Then you’ll see that we’re not apart
On peaceful nights in silence deep
Into your dreams I often creep

Heal your heart with love sublime
Dry your tears let the knot unwind
In every breath you’ll see the sign
We are made of spirit divine

When I crashed my bike that day
My body broke but I am not dead
Consciousness does not dissipate
My light and my love perpetuate

100 days in the light today
Some day you too will come this way
I pray you trust me when I say
Death does nothing to the soul

Hold that space with love for me
A look, a whisper, a kiss
A breath, a day, a thousand lifetimes.
Love is.

1 January 2012

100 Days in Grief

The angel of grief has stolen my light
Wisps of your shadow in the sleepless night
Lost in the labyrinth of how and why
Alone in the scattered debris of my life

Separated by the vast empty divide
I bear the loss I cannot bear
Raising silent fist to empty sky
Swallowed by the dark hole that you left behind

Gone, the dreams I didn’t know I had
Gone, the ground I didn’t know I could stand
Gone, the reason for me to go on
My grief is all I have left of you